Key factors to consider
Money mechanics
Who pays what, in what proportion, and what happens to shared costs if one income changes.
Expectations about the future
Is this a step towards something, a convenience, or a trial? Mismatched framing causes most of the fallout.
How you handle conflict now
Cohabiting doesn't create conflict styles, it amplifies existing ones.
Space and rhythm
Alone time, sleep schedules, tidiness and guests are small daily frictions with large cumulative effect.
The unwind plan
Lease names, deposits and shared purchases decide how painful a separation would be. Agree it while things are good.
Common mistakes
- Moving in mainly to save on rent.
- Never discussing what moving in means about commitment.
- Assuming chores and money will 'sort themselves out'.
- Putting one name on a lease without a written understanding.
- Using cohabiting to fix a relationship that's already struggling.
Questions to ask yourself
- 1.What does moving in mean to each of us about where this is heading?
- 2.How will we split costs, and what changes if one of us earns less?
- 3.How do we each recharge, and will this home allow that?
- 4.What would we do if it isn't working in six months?
- 5.What are we each quietly hoping will change once we live together?
Ready to decide?
ThatEcho turns this into your own workspace — goals, criteria, weighted options and a transparent recommendation you can question.